


Under the (Shot) Gun

by randi2204



Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: 3K Round-up Challenge, Gen, Implied Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-12
Updated: 2016-06-12
Packaged: 2018-07-14 12:56:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7172648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randi2204/pseuds/randi2204
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>The most surprising thing about seeing a man with a shotgun storming down the main street and bellowing “Wilmington! Get out here, you son of a bitch!” was the fact that Chris had only ever seen it once – well, maybe twice – before.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Under the (Shot) Gun

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** Not mine, no money.

The most surprising thing about seeing a man with a shotgun storming down the main street and bellowing “Wilmington! Get out here, you son of a bitch!” was the fact that Chris had only ever seen it once – well, maybe twice – before.

 

“Oh, hell,” he muttered, and stepped off the boardwalk to hurry up the street and head the man off before someone got hurt.

 

As he got closer, he recognized the man and his stomach dropped suddenly into his boots.  It was Joe Pike, a grizzly bear of a man, who had a disposition to match even at the best of times.  He also had a daughter named Beth, innocent enough to believe Buck’s every line, and pretty enough to make him think of some new ones besides.

 

“Mister Pike!” he called, just as Pike reached the door of the boarding house where Buck stayed.  Pike swung to face him, shotgun barrel leading, and Chris stopped short, raised his hands.  “S’pose you could put up the shotgun?  Don’t need that to talk like civilized people…”

 

Pike pointed the shotgun away from him, but didn’t lower it.  “Only talkin’ I’m gonna do is to that whoreson that…” His face flushed a brighter red, embarrassment covering his outrage.  “That was… havin’ _relations_ with my daughter.  Then I’m gonna castrate him.”  His thumb caressed the hammers of the shotgun.

 

Chris tried not to wince, he really did, but that was an image that was just _too_ vivid.  He let his hands drop slightly. “Mister Pike…”

 

“And you’d better not be thinkin’ of protectin’ him, either, Larabee,” Pike said, his heavy blond brows drawn together in a scowl.  “Heard he’s your friend, but you’d best keep out of this.”

 

“Some problem?” Vin appeared at Chris’s side, thumbs tucked into his gun belt.  His eyes flicked from Pike, to the barrel of the shotgun, still vaguely pointed at the boarding house door, to Chris and back again.

 

“Apparently Buck…” Chris started.

 

He got no further.  “Wilmington’s been… interferin’ with my daughter,” Pike growled.  “An’ I’m aimin’ to make sure he pays for it.  Soon as he shows his cowardly face!” His voice rose into a shout that seemed loud enough to shake the shutters.

 

“Hell, I never been to a shotgun weddin’ before,” Vin said, and leant one shoulder against the nearest support post, his lips quirking up in a barely-there grin.

 

“Not sure you’re going to be to one now, either,” Chris answered.  “Now, Mister Pike, I’ve known Buck for a long time, and one thing he’s not is a coward.”

 

“He is, however, not in residence at this time.”  Ezra strolled down the boardwalk to stand opposite Vin.  “I don’t believe he’s returned yet from his patrol… he was headed out by Mister Pike’s place, wasn’t he, Mister Larabee?”

 

Chris shot Ezra a hot glare that told him he wasn’t helping in the slightest, but Ezra just gave him his most infuriating grin in return, refusing to be intimidated.

 

Pike bristled even more; his short fair hair seemed to stand on end.  “Yes!  I saw him and Beth… but he had ridden off before I was able to get my shotgun.  But he’s gotta come back eventually, and I’ll be waitin’ for him.”

 

“May not have to wait long,” Vin said, straightening.  He nodded down the street behind Pike, where Buck’s grey was just entering town, Buck nodding lazily in the saddle.

 

Chris didn’t even have time to blow out a sigh of frustration before Pike spun around, lifting the shotgun to his shoulder.  “Wilmington!” he roared, and Buck’s head shot up from his doze.  “You get down off that horse,” he continued, moving closer, aim never wavering.  “Soon as I get the preacher, we’re headin’ back to my place and havin’ a weddin’.”

 

“Now, Mister Pike,” Buck began, lips curved in his most charming grin – the one that had made ladies swoon from Dodge City to Mexico.  He raised his hands, as Chris had done, but made no move to dismount.  “I don’t know what all this is about, but…”

 

“Sounds like it’s about a weddin’,” Vin muttered, lips twitching.  Ezra flashed a gold-tinted grin at him, then turned back to watch the tableau.  This time Chris glowered at both of them – not that it did any good that he could see.  Instead, he edged a little closer to Pike, trying to figure out how he was going to disarm the man.

 

“Like hell!”  Pike thumbed back the hammers.  “Now get down,” he ordered, teeth gritted.

 

Buck swung down and stood by his grey, hands still held up in the air.  “Mister Pike, I just…”

 

“I saw you kissin’ her!”

 

Buck let out a breath just this side of exasperated. “It was a kiss on the cheek!”

 

“And did she tell you how young Thaddeus’s courtship was proceeding?”

 

For a moment the only sound that could be heard on the dusty street was Buck’s grey chewing his bit.  Chris and Pike both turned to look at Ezra, frowning.

 

Then Buck grinned again.  “Seems like it’s proceeded right well, from what she said.” Chris glanced at him just in time to see him waggle his eyebrows.

 

“Thaddeus?” Finally, Pike lowered the shotgun.  “You mean Teddy Simmons? His pa owns the place just past mine?”

 

Ezra stepped down into the street, patting Chris on the shoulder as he passed by.  “Yes, indeed!  Why, Mister Wilmington was telling me how Miss Beth was pining for the boy, so he offered to squire her about, to incite young Thaddeus’s jealousy.”  He reached Buck, and clapped his shoulder in turn.  “It would seem to have worked, Mister Wilmington.  Well done.”

 

Chris stared, vaguely hoping his mouth wasn’t gaping open in shock.  Pike’s was, as he boggled at the scam played out in front of him.

 

Buck’s grin grew even wider, if that was even possible, and he lowered a hand enough to smooth down his mustache.  “She told me today that she wasn’t gonna need my services any more, Teddy’d done made his move, so I kissed her on the cheek and wished her all the best.”  His voice dropped a bit, as Chris knew it did when he was really being sincere.

 

“Ah, young love,” Ezra said, and that wistful note in his voice was completely feigned, Chris knew.  “And, if I’m not mistaken, here comes Miss Beth now.”

 

The dust cloud coming into town revealed itself to be Beth Pike, whose only resemblance to her mother was in her petite size; she was as blond as her father, with the same blue eyes.

 

And apparently the same temper, for she threw herself off her lathered horse and stood between Buck and her father, scowling in a way that would have been ferocious if she hadn’t been so tiny.  “Don’t you hurt him, Daddy!” she ordered.  “He was only helpin’ me!  He only ever held my hand or kissed my cheek!”

 

“Beth…” Pike’s anger started to rumble back up.

 

Ezra sidled away from Buck, Beth and Pike.  “Clearly, there are some familial discussions that need to take place, to which strangers should not be privy.  If you’ll excuse us, Mister Pike, Miss Beth?” He tipped his hat.

 

Chris pulled himself together and the four peacekeepers beat a retreat to the saloon.

 

“I’ll kill him!” echoed down the street, and Chris looked over his shoulder to see Pike stomping toward his horse.

 

“Guess one of us should get Josiah,” Vin said just in back of Chris’s shoulder.  “Looks like there’s gonna be a shotgun weddin’ anyway.”

 

Ezra had already settled in at his table, and Chris leaned over him, giving him his most fearsome glare.  “That was a line of hogwash you and Buck were spillin’, right?”

 

Ezra just dimpled up at him.  “If that’s what you want to believe, Mister Larabee.”

 

Shaking his head, Chris straightened.  Before he could move back toward the bar, though, Ezra added, “And please let Mister Wilmington know that he’s got all my patrols for the next week.”  When Chris just blinked at him, Ezra somehow managed to look almost angelic.  “I did warn him this would happen…”

**Author's Note:**

> A fill for the [fic_promptly](http://fic-promptly.dreamwidth.org/) prompt [Author's choice, author's choice, shotgun wedding](http://fic-promptly.dreamwidth.org/56877.html?thread=2626349#cmt2626349).


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